Marriage Self Help – When You Feel Like You’re In It Alone

by R.P. Smith on February 8, 2010

Very few marriages exist without reaching a crucial fork in the road at some point and a marriage self help strategy can be very effective when this happens. Many marriages have reached the point where separation and possibly even divorce begins to seem like the only option. Often times, one spouse remains committed to the marriage despite his or her unhappiness and the other spouse seems ambivalent or even unaware that there is a problem.


The following marriage self help strategies can be extremely effective even if you feel like you are in this thing alone:


1.    Heal your self - This is not a suggestion to enter marriage counseling. Often times these so-called “marriage counselors” are nothing more than licensed therapists with little or no actual training in how to save a marriage. I’m talking about individual counseling to help you sort through your own issues.


2.    Worry about your self - Do not engage in personal attacks on your spouse. Do not be critical of them. Stay positive and worry about your own words and actions. Take ownership for what you do and say, regardless of what you may think or feel about the other person.


3.    Make time for yourself - Do what you love! Engage in hobbies or activities that make you happy. Involve your spouse if it makes sense and he or she is interested but make time for yourself to pursue what you enjoy doing.


4.    Take care of your self – Regardless of how lousy you may be feeling in this marriage, better diet and exercise are bound to help. You’ll feel better and be in a much more resourceful state to handle the adversity.


Marriage self help as I’m talking about here is about working on yourself to improve your marriage. This will pay dividends regardless of what your spouse’s role is in all this. You can still save your marriage even if your partner is not willing to try.

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Article by R.P. Smith

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